the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize