I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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