apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
