Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
