You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
