I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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