i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
you will always have a special place in my vag
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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