pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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