At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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