i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
he shaved USA in his pubs
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
