You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
