are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
