i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Randomize
