talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
