so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
