corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
