Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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