A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
She swung at the pinata with crutches
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
