so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
