Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
