SEEEEXXX PLEASE
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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