Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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