I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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