I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
