Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize
