Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
