12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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