You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Randomize
