Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
