He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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