dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
