Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
you will always have a special place in my vag
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
