Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
