it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize
