Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
