White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
