Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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