try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Acid is not a monday night drug
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
