that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
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