so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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