only if we run a train.
done.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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