Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
