I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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