I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
