just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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