I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I'm passing your future prison.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Randomize
