you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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