I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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