My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
