i always forget guys have bellybuttons
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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